The Art of the Handshake

21 Feb

Maybe it’s just me and my group of friends,  but we truly value the art of a good handshake. You always hear the age old saying, “first impressions are everything.” Well, when I meet someone and I extend my hand out to shake his/her respective hand, this is the moment of truth for me. There are a few variations that I see most commonly. Shall I break it down?

The “Dead Fish” Handshake: Quite possibly, the worst handshake out there. When someone reaches out to shake your hand, please do not offer him/her a limp, dead fish-like hand. I know the intention is to avoid crushing the reciprocating party’s hand, but let’s not offer a dead fish! Stiffen that hand up a little bit and shake it like you mean it.

The “I Mean Business” Handshake: This appears to be the most common handshake that I have encountered. You are meeting someone for the first time and their grip is tight and lingers for a few seconds longer than it probably should. I get the vibe that this person means business, perhaps they’re excited to meet you as well. But at the end of the day, they want the job, or they want you to feel their importance.

The “Wink and a Gun” Handshake:  You’re either buying a used car or you’re meeting a game show host if you encounter this handshake… or it’s your cheesy uncle playing around with you. Either way, if you get the wink and a gun hand shake, run! This handshake suggests that someone either wants something from  you, or they are trying to brown nose their way into a situation (unless of course, it’s your cheesy uncle).

“Props,” otherwise known as the fist bump : Props, short for proper, short for proper respect, is the modern day handshake. As sported by Howie Mandel, props replaces the actual act of shaking hands, whereby the individuals literally just “pound fists.” This can be seen not just by the germaphobe, but the athlete, the teenagers at the local high school, or even the president of the United States.

The “solid” Handshake: This is the ideal handshake. Both parties go into the handshake with a strong, firm hand. The grip is not too hard, and not too soft. The duration of the handshake is long enough to acknowledge the other party, but not too long whereby the other party feels the need to reclaim their hand back. The appropriate shaking takes place, going up and down 1 to 3 times.

Well, that’s my break down of the most common types of handshakes. I’m sure you’re wondering what prompted me to write this blog. I figured, since I am a fresh graduate and I will be going on many job interviews (hopefully), I might as well master the art of the handshake. Take it with a grain of salt, it’s all in good fun, but there it is!




4 Responses to “The Art of the Handshake”

  1. vartevarlfc February 23, 2012 at 1:33 pm #

    YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!! how do we become friends?! i love your blog layout, you must help! how do i put categories like you did lmao!

  2. vartevarlfc February 23, 2012 at 7:33 pm #

    Alright!! I read it! the handshake! and boy am I impressed that your mind would come up with such a random, hilarious blog! I seriously was beginning to think, what kind of damn handshake do I do? I realized that I do the very strong one at job interviews. Pretty much, because men are always told to have firm grips. As for the “solid” handshake, that is my favorite. I always try to make a solid one, but I tend to have other men crush my hand thinking they have bigger cohones then me. This is not the case, solid handshake, and respect each other. Another well written blog, I’ve got no chance at outblogging you haha!

  3. Bianca Lee Mondino March 4, 2012 at 9:54 pm #

    This post is GOLD. Weak handshakes are a total deal-breaker for me (and I’m sure for potential employers)!!!


  1. Going on a Job Interview? | Merzybean - March 9, 2012

    […] Have a firm handshake. I’ve written an entire blog post about this, I shall direct you there now. The Art of the Handshake. […]

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